For Myself

"Gamble everything for love,
if you're a true human being.

If not,
leave this gathering.

Half-heartedness doesn't reach
into Majesty."

Trying now to understand these words in regard to my relationship with myself. So much darkness to be wading through, so much pain, regret. Trying to remember the brevity of each individual moment, these demons have followed me relentlessly for too many nights now. I will get there, wherever this there is, that elusive point of peace. I don't want to be so critical of everything anymore, I don't want to be so judgmental, so eager to find problems and fault. The support of my friends is like a light at the other end of the room; I long to be there with you, and am searching with great determination to find my own light, that I might get there. I won't give up on myself, don't give up on me.