Word On A Gravestone

heart; exploding, singing out -- crying
like a
buidling falling in on itself

the supports once so
sturdy
out of sight, out of sight, out of
mind.
out of my mind. (?)

when you reach out, they tell you,
into the darkness,
there will be a hand there to meet your hand,
a guide to meet your recklessness,
something,
anything.

question after scornful question like
when did two and two become five,
when did..
my eyes glass over.
that he who would shine closer by.
when did,
why did i never recieve an invitation
to go dancing,
why was i never enough,
never enough.
the light in my core,
cold and hollow, flickers for an instant
like death.
bloated fish floating on an icy river,
kholibri tells you that
even before the asking
even before
the questions have been answered.

a gushing and
feeling foolish / scared / terrified
who is it,
eyes blue with
shining tears as yours are
blue blue like the tundra,
the warmest of places is that
that one who never lets you down
takes your
fears and second-guessing
mistakes
always willing to begin anew,
takes you for your weaknesses and insecurities
takes you for the fact that you are a human being,
who is it...
anne
thank you for being
you
thank you for that
note you sent that i continue to go back to,
in my second-guessing
my insecurities
i am
in love now, and not afraid anymore
[so much]
will not find fear in being truthful --
will not find cold, empty, loneliness
in my fear
i am in love now.
and that changes everything.